Red Cookies and Thoughts of a Messed Up Mind

My 12 year old was to take either a pink or red snack for her Sunday school class.

No problem. 

Most 'normal' moms would go buy a snack or make a snack. And that would be the end of the story.

Easy. 

Oh, but not me....

You see, I am about the farthest thing from normal you'll ever find! (I really don't mind being "not normal"... I just don't enjoy stressing over every little detail, and all the what ifs make me exhausted on a daily basis). 

I live with Chronic Stress (along with multiple autoimmune diseases and cancer). I know most people say they are "stressed out". But for me, the term "stress" has a much different meaning. My body is actually unable to process stress. 

There are medical terms - but the easiest way to understand it is simply know what the effects of stress can do to a normal person - then multiply it by 100 - that's what stress is like for me. When my body is stressed - it attacks my cells and literally tries to destroy its-self.

Pretty much everything causes me stress.... 

So here's a little bit of what taking a snack to Sunday school class looks like in my messed up mind... And what I put my family though on the norm....

We have a whole week to figure out what snack to take. W

I think about it off and on pretty much all week....we look online a little almost every day, but we are having a hard time thinking of something.... 

Now it's Saturday.... we can't put it off any longer.

It's crunch time! 

My daughter and I spend hours looking at pictures of pink or red snacks on Google and pinterest. She loses interest and comes and goes. 

I keep looking. 

I could make pink popcorn trail mix. 

No, my daughter has braces and can't eat popcorn. 

I'll make knox blocks or jello roll ups. 

Nope, my daughter hates jello - it jiggles... (she gets that from her Grandpa Frick). 

I'll make Cupcakes. 

She says it's too common and everyone will bring cupcakes. 

She doesn't like chewy candy, so anything like starbursts, or fruit roll ups, or sweedish fish are out. 

Not that I have any of that in the pantry anyway.... 

She finally has comes up with something she likes..... and it's pink!

Strawberry Mochi. 

Ok, cool idea!

But, she'd have to put it in the freezer at church and then go down to the kitchen during class to get it back out of the freezer.... 

Not sure that would work great.

Wait.

. 

I don't have any strawberry mochi in the freezer.

And I'm not driving all the way to town to get some.

Maybe we could make pink or red white chocolate covered pretzels? 

Or mini strawberry cheesecake in muffin tins?

She doesn't like any of my idea's...... here's where I tell her to stop being so stubborn and just pick something!!!

Hallelujah!!! We finally find the idea a fruit kabobs with chunks of watermelon, strawberries and red grapes.

Perfect! 

It's something my daughter will eat, it's red and pink, and it looks cute! 

Problem. 

I don't have watermelon, and only have frozen strawberries, and fresh green grapes. 

I call all the little stores around us. No one has fresh watermelon or strawberries. 

I could go to town and buy some. 

I am not driving over an hour to get watermelon and strawberries for a Sunday school snack. 

Scratch that idea. 

At this point, I try convincing my daughter that apples are red. We can cut up apple slices and make a pink fruit dip... 

She says that's too messy. Plus, we'd have to take paper pates for everyone, and I don't have any paper plates. 

By this time I have invested most of the day into finding a snack.... 

I now have a headache. 

We finally decide to just make homemade chocolate chip cookies, add food coloring, and be done with it. 

Simple. Right?

Wrong..... 

Since we dyed the ookie dough red, you couldn't tell when the cookies were done in the oven, because you couldn't see them turning brown like you normally would.

This then causes a whole new worry. 

Are the cookies cooked all the way through or are they over done? 

The first batch was too gooy.. 

Let's put them back in the oven. 

But for how long?

I don't want her to take dry, hard cookies. 

The first batch of cookies looked too puffy, so we flattened the second batch before baking. 

The second batch was too flat, so we tried to only flatten the third batch just a tiny bit. 

But then are there gonna be enough cookies that look all alike for her to take? 

I don't think so. 

So, we left the last batch puffy to match the first batch... 

I think there is enough! 

Now we have the question of how many cookies to take? 

One for each person in the class?

Two? 

They are really small cookies... should we do three? 

No, surely if everyone brings a snack, one cookie per person would be enough. 

But what about visitors? 

Maybe we should add in a few extra. 

Good, That's settled. One a peice, plus a few extra. I can live with that logic. 

What to put the cookies in? 

I get out a clear container.... they fit perfectly. 

But what is she supposed to do with the container after Sunday school? 

Bring it into the sanctuary with her? 

That's not really being reverent to God, carrying around a cookie container. 

Maybe she can just leave the container in the classroom and then we can go get it after church? 

But what if we forget it? 

Maybe she should take it out to the car after Sunday school? 

But the car will be locked, and she doesn't always remember the unlock code. Plus, it's cold and snowy outside.

Maybe she can have her older brother take it to the car for her. He knows the unlock code and he is wearing boots.

But his Sunday school class doesn't get out as soon as hers, so she'd be standing in the hall holding a container, waiting for him.

Oh, nevermind.

Maybe I should just put them on a paper plate with plastic wrap over top?

That way if they eat them all, the plate can just be thrown away. 

But it's snowy and windy. And paper plates are flimsy. What if the wind whips the plate and cookies go flying everywhere? 

And if the class doesn’t eat them all, I will still be carrying around a paper plate with red chocolate chip cookies in church! 

Nope, I'll leave them in the container. 

We'll leave the container in the classroom. 

I'm sure one of us four will remember to pick it up after church is over. 

Now I can worry about forgetting the container from now until after church....

.......

I walk by the kitchen a bit later and think, 'I wonder if anyone will want to eat red chocolate chip cookies? They seriously look like play dough.' 

Maybe I should've just drove to town for the fruit.

 No, that's ridiculous. 

The cookies are fine. They taste good. And it's not every day you get to eat a red chocolate chip cookie! 

And then the next thought strikes.... 

What if some kids are allergic to red dye? (It really is a thing.)

Oh Lord, please don't let any kid have an allergic reaction to these cookies!

I'm exhausted.

 

I guess I'll ll just have to trust God to keep the kids from dropping dead while they eat red dyed, play dough looking, chocolate chip cookies.... 

I'm going to bed. 

But then, I lay wide awake thinking about what other red or pink snack we should have made. 

Wondering if I have any ingredients or the extra time in the morning to make something else. 

Sleep doesn't come. 

And I get to go through the process all over again in the morning when it's time to get ready for church.... 

Most people never understand how stressful that just getting ready to leave my house is for me.... 

Welcome to my messed up mind.......  

                                      ...... it's crazy up in here!