SRKindredSpirits

They still love playing with legos.... On hard days, these thoughts often linger in my mind.... When it feels like I can't go on...When my head is throbbing with pain. When every breath is more painful than the last, and my heart is breaking into a million pieces. When my tears won't dry, and just keep falling.  I feel utterly helpless - there's nothing I can do. I used to believe in miracles, but I don't understand how God can be so cruel. I love these kids. Why them? Why me? Why this?  My one and only wish is that my kids could be normal. I hate seeing them suffer, not knowing what their future holds or the suffering they will have to endure. The only way I can made it through each day is to keep telling myself... There has to be a reason that God made my kids this way. I pray that someday God will use them in a big way to bring people to Him.   I have no idea why God chose me to be their mom, I lack in so many ways. But God knows I love them. So...

The value of our home and land has nothing to do with what they are worth. How do you put a price tag on the memories you make? On the years of laughter you've shared, or the tears of heartbreak you've cried? Or the dreams that have come true because we chose to live here? When you add all those up.... we won the lottery to be able to call this place home! When you account for what we paid for the place, the improvements we've sunk into it, the thousands of trees and plants we've planted, the tons of stone and mulch we've hauled in... and all the other things that add up.... we are sunk. We will never get all the money back out of this place. But here's the thing.... if you love where you live.... if you truly decide to love where you live and dig in and live there.... truly live there, it doesn't matter whether you got ripped off or stole it when you bought it; the value of your home will be much more than a professional home estimate could ever ...

Don't just sort through stuff without getting rid of it. Put it in boxes/bags, and donate it! Don't just organize- deown! Your clutter wars will never be over if all you do is keep re organizing... it's a never ending battle, one you will NOT win.  Don't keep something you no longer enjoy because a family member/friend/ busybody says that you need to keep it, or that it's an heirloom peice, or whatever excuse reason they want you to keep it. Don't let them make the decision for you. It's not their stuff. It's ok to let it go.... it has served its purpose.  Don't keep something because you may need it someday.... someday has come and went. Let it go. My husband and I have gotten rid of trailer loads of stuff and there has been only a couple times (in the years since then) that we think oh, man, I had one of them and got rid of it, but we made do perfectly without it, so in reality, we didn't need it at all. Someday hardly ever com...

A few weeks ago, we got together with my side of the family, - my parents, siblings, and all our kids to have family pictures taken.  The whole family, minus one sister in law.... I always struggle when it comes to extended family . I had a great life growing up as a kid, but my teen years and into adult life have had there fill of extended family issues.... On one hand, I love my parents and siblings and want to be involved in family get togethers, but on the other hand, there's been too much pain, too many differences, and too much water under the bridge, to make it worthwhile.  Oh, we all get along when we are together, but it's like we are all trying to be something that we aren't. For now, I still go to most family get togethers.... I make an appearance, but try not to stay too long or be too involved....( I struggle with chronic stress, which seems to flare up more around my extended family), so for me, its just better that way. You see, I'm...

If you ever wanted to know how mental illness can effect people, Leaving Cloud 9 is a great read. This book could've been written by my someone I used to know. There are so many comparisons to things he went through as a child, yet in some ways, his experience was different too. I was so young at the time - 16, and I was pretty nieve. I didn't know anything about mental illness. If I did, I really think things would have ended differently. I wish that I could've helped him get the help he needed. I really think people struggling with mental illness just need someone to love them, and walk beside them and to get them help, wether that's medication or therapy, etc... they really just need someone to believe in them. I believe everyone could benefit from reading cloud nine! Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the  book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The...

There are different seasons in every one's life.... but in my life, it is especially true. I'm thirty-five, but I've lived three different lives.  In the first life.... I grew up conservative . I was the middle kid out of seven. We grew up on a farm and learned to work at a young age. We made our own clothes, as a girl, I was not allowed to wear pants, a watch, jewelry, or to get my hair cut. We did not have a TV. We were home schooled. For the most part, I had a great childhood. I loved going to the auction barn with dad, eating ice cream floats on the front porch after a hot day of baling hay, riding go carts, or playing in the playhouse. Having sleepovers with my best friend Carla, was my favorite.  When I was 12, that all changed. My parents took us away from the church, friends, and family that we knew and loved. They joined a even more conservative church (cult) out of state. Life suddenly turned upside down. I hated my parents and their beliefs. I felt l...